Weightloss Haterz

I was just reading a tumblr post about Brooke Birmingham’s rejected bikini photo from Shape magazine - she lost 172lbs but because of her excess skin the photo was never published. The post started a lengthy discussion on the hate that comes with weight loss, and it’s alot more common that I thought.

For the past two years I’ve held my head up high as some friends and family chose to “support” me through negative comments. After losing the first noticeable 20lbs, some family members made statements like “OMG stop losing weight already!” and “wow I’d love to see you get super skinny, I wonder what you would look like then..?” I know this was just their flash reaction to the start of my transformation, but they probably didn’t realize what they really just said to me. One comment was filled with discouragement and borderline disgust with my progress, while the other made me feel like I would never be thin enough in their eyes, they wouldn’t consider me attractive until I was skin and bones. Speaking of skin and bones, that’s a comment I hear a lot whenever I hug certain family members now, after an almost 60lb loss. Even though that couldn’t be further from the truth, it still hurts and is not a compliment. I am at a great weight, I am fit, and I am healthy. There are no bones poking out anywhere. The worst comment of all was a relative shouting to me at a crowded party “you’ve lost too much weight, you don’t have boobs anymore!”. I know this only came from a place of jealousy, and to my defense I was wearing a tight sports-bra at the time, but suggesting I stay unhealthy just to keep my chest bigger was ridiculous. I used to think that way myself, better not lose weight because my boobs will get smaller… how pathetic.

As you lose weight not everyone is going to be happy for you or cheering you on. It’s important to remember this is about you and your body and your perspective. Their opinions don’t matter, and their comments come from their own insecurities. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad about making a positive change in your life. Also, I applaud you Brooke for taking the high road and staying rightfully proud of your body. I’m proud of myself as well for not letting hateful comments infect my fragile mind and steer me off track from my goals. Screw the haters.

Aug 3

Doing great!

I am doing great! How are y’all?

Tomorrow will be my last day on medication and then I’m free! I know I haven’t exactly posted what was wrong in the first place, but it doesn’t matter now because my doctor says my tummy is all healed and better! :)

This also means we can start trying for kids soon, and I’m super excited to possibly be a mommy! I’m still going to have to wait just a little longer for the medicine to be completely out of my system so we don’t risk any complications, but I am still super happy to be fully recovered, feeling great, looking great, lovin’ life!

I am still sitting pretty at my goal weight, but I know once I’m pregnant that will all change, and I’m ready for that. Some people have questioned how I’d handle it, gaining all the weight I worked so hard to lose back. Honestly, I’m looking forward to the challenge! Having a healthy baby, starting our family, and staying healthy together, that’s what’s most important to me.

We have been very active at our new house. We go biking regularly, walk around the block at dusk, and we even have a net in the backyard where we have been playing bad-mitten and volleyball. Life is good. Hopefully we’ll fit more swimming in soon- summer is going too fast as usual!

Enjoy that summer heat while it lasts!

Another wonderful year in our marriage has passed. He has taught me so much, inspired me, encouraged me, helped me through everything. I am happier than ever and healthier than ever, and it is all thanks to him. When you find a good man out there, never let him go. <3
I love watching this photo grow along with us.

Another wonderful year in our marriage has passed. He has taught me so much, inspired me, encouraged me, helped me through everything. I am happier than ever and healthier than ever, and it is all thanks to him. When you find a good man out there, never let him go. <3

I love watching this photo grow along with us.

size small!

After trying on my summer clothes and swimsuit that I just bought LAST year… those saggy bottoms meant one thing… TIME TO SHOP! I ended up buying a tankini in size small, a new maxi skirt also in small, and the bottom half of me is still a medium (dat ass), but I never imagined I’d be buying these sizes! I have to admit, it feels great, and the selection is superior. I have been very active this past week with a new house to unpack- that has been my workout! My nightly treats have got to stop though, all this ice cream is bound to catch up on me. You know what they say, old habits die hard.

In other news:

After all my shopping today, I got home to discover a jacket I bought never rang up at the register, I essentially got it for free. I feel really guilty about it but at the same time, there mistake right? I’m scared to bring it back because I don’t want to be accused of stealing, and I also don’t want the associate to get in trouble… I have never had this happen before! It was a clearance item on sale so it’s not like it was that expensive, and it was the only one left so my guess is it might of not been recognized by the system so it slipped through the cracks… I don’t know what to do, I guess I should just enjoy it? right? lol ughh clearly I need to pay more attention at the checkout! For once I wasn’t concerned with the cost now that the penny-pinching for a house is over. Has this ever happened to one of you?

Hey so I saw that you lost 56, congrats that is amazing Im just curious how long did it take and what did you do to lose weight?

thank you!!! I started exercising and eating better June 2012, so it has taken almost 2 years! I highly recommend Jillian Michael’s 30 Day Shred DVD, and become a master at counting calories. I was able to still eat all the foods I love- just watch my portions! Also, drink lots of water daily! If you really want the weight gone for good, you have to think long term. Two years seems like a long time, but you have to take it day by day. Best of luck :)

Holy crap!

I haven’t been online much the past few days and come back to a huge amount of messages! Thank you all for your support! It’s always been important to me to post progress photos because that’s exactly what got me motivated to start- seeing other real people lose weight and succeed the old fashioned way- no tricks, just hard work and patience. I’m so happy to be able to inspire others in return for all the times I’ve looked at before & afters here- wishing, hoping, dreaming of the day I could be that. It was all absolutely worth it.


Jun 8
56 pounds. gone!

56 pounds. gone!

Jun 7

STILL losing weight!?

Lately the mirror has been telling me I better go weigh myself… I am now down 56lbs!? I don’t know if I should be concerned or proud. I’m still dealing with some health issues but I am feeling so much better and am finally without pain. I have been eating normal portions and not working out, so this loss is head-scratching. I’m still at a healthy weight, and it honestly wouldn’t hurt for me to lose a few more, but I am a little worried there’s something else going on with my body that I don’t know about. This is my “goal weight” and what I want to aim to hover around for the rest of my life. I think it’s a great weight for me, it just seems like I obtained it a little too easily. (especially since I have been having a big bowl of ice cream almost every night…oops) I guess the only logical answer is 1.) losing muscle weight from not working out or 2.) my body is still adjusting to my healthier diet. After-all, I used to eat two times the amount I do now, and about five times less healthy! Alright, I suppose I’ve convinced myself that I’m fine.

We are in the process of moving this month, so things have been quite hectic! My right arm is killing me from painting all day yesterday and lifting a crazy heavy tv. So I am officially claiming today as a day of rest and relaxation!

52lbs is amazing!!!! be proud!!!!! are you still working out to lose more or maintain?



I’m happy maintaining, but I’d still like to gain more muscle once it’s safe for me to workout again. For now I just take the occasional walk and do my best to remain relaxed because that’s whats best for me right now. :)

i dont even know u other then ur blog but i have followed you since the 30ds and i can relate to the anxity issues i hope u feel better soon sounds like ur getting there hope its nothing to serious :(


Thank you. I really don’t want anyone to worry, I’m worried enough for everyone! lol! My issue is common, but also serious at this stage, but so far I am responding well to the meds and because of my age and overall health I should be safe of any possible complications. My doctor doesn’t seem to be concerned at all, but that doesn’t help me much. lol! I will keep updating, please don’t worry my lovely followers! I’m regretting that post already! I’ll be okay! :)

Health Update

It’s been awhile since I have updated this thing… *taps mic* this thing on?

Truth be told I am still on a roller-coaster of emotions. I have good news, bad news, and news I just don’t want to share.

Some good news, I have reached my goal weight! I’m now officially down 52 pounds. Unfortunately, I’m struggling to enjoy my victory because I haven’t worked out in months and the weight-loss is due to health problems. At least I can say I lost a majority of that through hard work.

More good news: the house hunt is over and we should be moving early next month. My stress levels are finally going down and I have been blissfully packing. The best part is the house is super close to my family, so I will be able to see them more, which is great because I need the support right now. Also, the house is close to a huge park that we love and I cannot wait to take off on the bike trail!

Then there’s the bad news… I have been on a lot of different medication lately. It turns out my anxiety symptoms were a little more serious than I had hoped, but I’m going to be fine. I hope. I think. Ugh. This is what sucks about having anxiety on top of other problems, your troubles just keep spinning around and around. Some good news though, I will be off all but one medication by the end of the month, which is great because my energy has been drained, I’m exhausted all the time.

Back to the bad news, we can’t start trying for kids until I am completely off all medication. That definitely put a damper on my plans to start filling our new house with kids ASAP. In the end, it’s for the best, because my health needs to be priority. It’s not anything I’m embarrassed to talk about, it’s just sorta scary (NOT cancer thank god) and most of my family doesn’t even know what I’m going through so it’s not something I’m going to plaster on the internet. Once my treatment’s over (3-5 months…sigh) I should be better than ever!

Until then, I can do mild exercise and eat normally, and just try to stay calm and relaxed and happy :)

Apr 7

At first I was skeptical that something like this would have any effect on the way I’m feeling. It sounds crazy to listen to a soothing voice telling you how to feel, but I’m honestly glad I gave it a try, and feel better for it. I wanted to post this publicly to help anyone else who may feel like they have forgotten how to relax, maybe your stressed, anxious, depressed, or all of the above… take some time for yourself, close you eyes, and just listen. It certainly relaxed me and best of all gave me hope and a clear vision of who I want to be.

You can get through this. Sending positive energy your way ~~~~

Listen to it again and again, as much as you need. Stay calm and stay at peace. <3

Mar 7


I knew the home buying process was going to be stressful, but I had no idea it was going to be THIS stressful. My anxiety has been at an all time high, and it’s been affecting just about every aspect of my life. The worst part is I don’t see that ending soon. It’s scary!

I have talked a lot about becoming healthy on this blog, and that hasn’t really included mental health, but it should. Social anxiety has been my burden for as long as I can remember. I deal with it well, and often force myself into uncomfortable situations just to continue my progress. In fact, most people have no idea that I struggle with this.

Lately I have been feeling a whole new form of anxiety. The pressure of finding the right house, staying in budget, educating myself on all the terms, learning about taxes, negotiating, mortgages, insurance,… I have been fully engulfed for months, and I’m starting to crack. That on top of everything else in life- it’s too much! This is the first time my anxiety has caused me physical discomfort. My throat swells with stress, my heart races, and my chest tightens. It’s easy to start to panic, or even feel like I’m dying. I am embarrassed to admit that I don’t always handle situations with ease, that I may cry about things, or even have panic attacks, but holding it in and keeping it secret only makes everything worse.

Also, I’m not alone in feeling this way as my constant google searching has revealed, so I take comfort in that. So maybe one of you might take comfort in knowing despite me being my usual happy self, I too struggle with depression from time to time behind closed doors, and that’s okay. I refuse to let anxiety control my life. This phase will pass, and I will keep breathing and keep moving forward.

My health is very important to me, physical and mental. No matter what else may be going on, I can’t lose focus on myself and my well being. Sometimes I just need a reminder to take a break and relax, let my mind be at ease, let my worries float away, let my body rest. So, with all that said, now I must take a deep breath and relax!


and on an unrelated note,..

Read More

setbacks and such!

Let me start off by saying I absolutely cannot wait to get back into working out again! I just finished a mild 20 min workout to get the blood flowing. I wish I could say it felt great, but it was embarrassingly strenuous for me. It’s been a long time since I’ve pushed myself, and I want to get back into beast mode!

I don’t get sick often these days, but when I do, it all clusters together into a full month of feeling like crap. First I had a virus, followed by never-ending bronchitis. I tried to workout after a week or so, but every time I attempted that my coughing worsened. My lungs just couldn’t take it, so I chose to take the time to rest and fully recover.

50 days later, and here I am… FINALLY back to healthy and ready to ease back into it. Other than being sick, I have been busy. As usual there’s a million things going on right now, but I think breaking away to workout will only help.

Now if I could just get the guts to weigh myself and see how much my rest period has set me back from my goals…. hmmm better give it a week.

Feb 5

The Biggest… Loser?

Um, can we just talk candidly about The Biggest Loser for a sec? *spoiler-ish*

I haven’t been watching this season except a few episodes here and there, and I just checked out of curiosity to see who won and…. wow.

The look of concern the judges and fellow contestants threw her said it all. I’m really shocked that NBC has even aired this, were they really that clueless that one of their contestants has resorted to anorexia to win? Or did they just not care enough? Don’t even tell me about her BMI and all that garbage, the girl looks sick and could barely get her fragile body up the stairs to weigh in! I am so sad to see her like this.

I never condoned the show for being very smart, like most of the diet industry they just want to sell you products and feed you false information. Infact, every weigh-in is a lie, and it can be wrongfully discouraging for anyone wanting to lose weight. The show sets more unhealthy, bad examples than good ones.

This finale was the final straw. Applauding an obvious eating disorder? After seeing the winner tonight, I’m just not going to watch anymore. This has gotten ridiculous. I hope they do something to give her the help she needs.